Monday, June 23, 2008



I love writing this blog. It is not only free to do but it is also great therapy. It is because of this blog that every bad thing that happens has a silver lining and that silver lining is a – hopefully funny – blog entry in the “I’m glad it is them not me” genre of writing.

I have never written a blog before and I have found it fascinating (my sister has been doing her’s relentlessly for almost two years). If you click on the sitemeter button at the bottom of this page it gives you all the information about our blog’s visitors: how many we have had (over 2300), how many pages have been read (over 6100), which countries people have visited from (hello the person from Goringen in the Netherlands who has become a regular reader) and the amount of time the average person spends reading it (3:03 minutes).

It also tells you the ‘referral’ - how people came across your blog, the links they clicked on or the words the typed into Google. And it is the latter that makes fascinating reading.

Over the last few months we have had people come to Operation Night Brace with the following searches:

Someone in Peru was looking for ‘the operation of the vaginal’ and got directed to the entry entitled ‘Vaginal wash”

Someone wanted to see ‘Julia Roberts arse’ and got to read the bit about the prostitute in Union Square with the ‘Tired of prostitution placard but need the money’ sign.

Etc etc.

None of these people spent very long on the blog so I thought I’d take this opportunity to clear a few things up. On this blog there is NO…

Horny naked twins
Dwarves masturbating
Smeared in honey virgins
Naked policemen
MILFs making out
Nut bondage

Hmmmm. Perhaps the “No” element of the above phrases won’t feature when people are searching. Oh well.

Welcome to Operation Night Brace horny internet surfers.

Please have a look around before you go blind.

It is lovely to have you here even if it is just for the 1 second that you will stay.


Jorien said...

Hi Amy and Gareth,

Thank you, and hello to you from Groningen!


Gareth & Amy said...

Hello Jorien!!!

At last you have a name. How did you come across the blog? Amy and I have been scratching our heads thinking about who we possibly knew in Groningen.

G :)

Jorien said...

Hello Gareth,

I started reading your sisters blog after she became a finalist of Masterchef. A few weeks ago she posted a picture of your "meatloaf-o-meter" and I had a look ad your blog.
I was (and am) very impressed by Operation Night Brace and like the way you write about it, so I keep comming back.


p.s. Sorry, I didn't find it by Googeling some funny words :)